Saturday, April 30, 2011

Leggings are not pants: a cautionary tale through photographs

For the past week, I'd had a bitchin' idea for what to wear for tutoring and a dinner at my husband's colleague's house on Friday (yesterday). I put on the outfit and looked down on myself and said "Awwww yeeeeeeeeah." Then I took the look to my bathroom and did elaborate poses to certify that the outfit was, indeed, bitchin' (I don't own a full-length mirror). Then I took some photos:

"Awww, yeah. Oh. Oh. Look at my big 'I've worked out regularly since 2002' thighs. Okay, well, I'm a little contorted. Let's take a more natural picture:"

"No. No. Dear God, no. Maybe if I had matchstick legs... Okay. I need to go change. This is inappropriate to wear in front of children."

"Oh, Lord, much better. Granted, I wore almost this exact same outfit two weeks ago, but I have flats on instead of boots, so it looks and is weather appropriate."

"Everything's gonna be aaaalllll right..."

(In hindsight, the first look wasn't that hideous, but, no. Leggings - even corduroy jeggings - need some sort of butt/pelvis covering in my case. Also, as soon as I got to my tutee's house, the other girl looked at me and sighed, "Oh, I LOVE your outfit." So if a thirteen-year-old arty hipster thinks I look cute, I'm okay. Validation, I get it from teenagers.)


  1. This is hilarious. You know you've made it, fashion wise, when you're complimented by teens. Seriously. I know I'm doing something right when my 17 year old cousin gives me a nod of approval.
    You are looking awesome, by the way. Sassy!

  2. What, no rear view? Also, hilarious.

  3. The fact that you posted what I go through almost everyday when getting ready is too funny! Cynthia and I are on the same page, I was waiting for the 'rear view looking at the camera over your shoulder' look. I do dig the outfit, but I'm like you, I prefer butt covering when wearing tight bottoms.

  4. BWAhahaha. This post made my day. I also totally agree about the need for rear-covering when wearing leggings, matchstick legs or otherwise. I saw some girl in jeggings the other day, and the fabric was a bit on the thin side, and I could totally see through them to her undies. Bad news bears.

    I love the outfit you ended up with, though! That tank top is just lovely. :)

  5. Allison, I think teen validation is super-important? Who knows better than they?

    Cynthia and Miss B, there will, uh, rarely be a rear shot. The front was traumatic enough this time.

    Ooh, Clare, traumatic. Now you've definitely cemented the need for rear-covering! And thanks for the kind words! :)